you can use enabled is false then The query will not automatically refetch in the background when new instances mount or new instances appear

this is react query example

     function Todos() {
2   const {
3     isIdle,
4     isLoading,
5     isError,
6     data,
7     error,
8     refetch,
9     isFetching,
10   } = useQuery('todos', fetchTodoList, {
11     enabled: false,
12   })
13 
14   return (
15     <>
16       <button onClick={() => refetch()}>Fetch Todos</button>
17 
18       {isIdle ? (
19         'Not ready...'
20       ) : isLoading ? (
21         <span>Loading...</span>
22       ) : isError ? (
23         <span>Error: {error.message}</span>
24       ) : (
25         <>
26           <ul>
27             {data.map(todo => (
28               <li key={todo.id}>{todo.title}</li>
29             ))}
30           </ul>
31           <div>{isFetching ? 'Fetching...' : null}</div>
32         </>
33       )}
34     </>
35   )
36 }

you just need to write some if conditions for enable to don't refatch in new instances that appear in your condition