This line is wrong:

spyOn($("#Something"), 'val').andReturn("bar");

Jasmine's spyOn function expects two parameters. The first is an existing object. The second is a function name as a string. You are correctly passing in the function name as a string ("val") but you are not passing in an existing object as the first parameter.

$("#Something")

...is not an existing object. It is the result (the return value) of a jQuery selector. More specifically, it will return a jQuery object representing the matched nodes - kind of like an array of results.

$

...is an existing object.

$.fn

...is an existing object.

$("#Something")

...is not an existing object - it is the result of a jQuery selector.

This will work:

it("should be able to mock DOM call", function () {
    //spyOn($.fn, "val").andReturn("bar"); //pre-jasmine 2.0 syntax
    spyOn($.fn, "val").and.returnValue("bar"); //Jasmine 2.0 Syntax
    var result = $("#Something").val();
    expect(result).toEqual("bar");
});

Seems like I found good solution

    it "should open past statuses", ->
      # We can't use $('.past') here cause each time $('.past') called it returns different objects
      # so we need to store spy in variable
      showSpy = spyOn($.fn, 'show')
      # do the stuff
      $('.show-past').click()
      # then check if 'show' action was called
      expect($.fn.show).toHaveBeenCalled()
      # and if it realy our object
      expect(showSpy.mostRecentCall.object.selector).toEqual('.past')

This is not based on your code but i hope this can help someone. And, yes, example in CoffeScript.

The problem is that the two calls to $ return two different jQuery-wrapped nodes.

This should work:

it("should be able to mock DOM call", function(){

  // var node = $("Something");
  // spyOn(node, 'val').andReturn('bar');

  // expect(node.val()).toEqual('bar');
  var node = $("Something");
  spyOn(node, 'val').and.returnValue('bar');

  expect(node.val()).toEqual('bar');
});

Next time, help is more prevalent on the Jasmine mailing list: jasmine-js@googlegroups.com.